Liquid Gauging

Originally posted on Typepad - March 3, 2008

Somebody call Al Gore. With gas prices on the rise (summer around the corner, and all the middle east conflict) it is conceivable that American's will pay $4.00 for a gallon of gas. This is common in Europe.

Besides that think of all the other liquids that we are paying too much for:

_ Milk - $3.50+ gal.
_ Coffee - Leave Starbucks with out paying $4.00!
_Water - $1.50 bottle

What else do we pay too much for?

The best thing that has happened to me

Originally posted on Typepad - February 29, 2008

I am proud of my wife. Since August of 2007 she's lost 62+ pounds.

She is more energetic, confident, we are all eating better, and she looks healthier.

I appreciate her courage to try something to improve her health. And now, she's helping others achieve their goals too.

She's the best thing that has ever happened to me!

Phil. 1:3

After spending a good chunk of time ('98-'04) with these guys on a regular basis, I've recently have been reacquainted with the genuineness, the coolness, the greatness that is Danny Rhines and Wes Ohaire. More Wes.

Two words: Tri-Fecta (pictured to the right)

If you ever get a chance to meet these guys and eat lunch with them, you need to buy!

Who are two favorite people you like to hang with - with no pretense?


*I am diggin' Joseph Zwanziger and his all seeing eye. Much love the the peeps of TFH.

The 30 Day Sex Challenge

I've signed up for the challenge! Now, to tell Melissa . . .

I know what I think about this challenge. What do you think about this challenge?

The worst sound...

. . . known to man is the sound of a drill in your mouth! I got a crown on an upper molar yesterday. I am really glad to say . . . NO PAIN! Dr. Rama was great. His staff were great!

He ground the existing tooth down to the gum line.

Cleaned the exposed root that was slightly damaged but looks like it will heal/restore itself.

Filled two cavities - one on top and one below. BTW - I took one of these pics while the crown was going on.

Digitally created a tooth that looked just like my old tooth, sent it to this crown making machine and installed the tooth.

I great experience, that I would recommend to anyone who has to go through it - Great customer service.

Thank you Dr. Adri Rama and the Rama Family Dentistry Family - Scottsdale, AZ.

NOTE TO SELF: Floss daily!

Doug & Elaine, Elaine and Doug!

Like many, we (my entire family) are Seinfeld fans.  Who isn't?

So I am at LAX this morning, minding my own business when Julia Louis Dryfus strolls up.  Honestly, I am not a Star Struck kind of person! I really tried not to stare.  I really tried not to take a picture. 

Carpe Diem got the best of me!  Not sure when she would ever get the chance to take a picture with me again so . . . . 

She was nice.  I was nice too . . . I didn't use a flash!

Who is the most famous person you've gotten a picture with?  

Video Blog

I enjoyed a good day today. Thank you Lord! I miss and love my family . . .

Video Email

I am in Valencia this weekend as I serve on the Board of Directors for Higher Vision Church.  Video Blog day one . . . .

Computer Issues

The Super Bowl and the FBR open were memorable events here in Phoenix. We had a good time with family and lots of food as we watched the SB in a memorable finish! Half of us were rooting for perfection and half rooted for the underdog. Everyone enjoyed the game! Both my boys were into the game (the fourth quarter). Melissa said the boys lost their Super Bowl virginity - I think they are look forward to next year's game!

My computer disk died this past weekend too! I took it into the Apple store on Monday and they proceeded to put a new disk in the machine. The y "tried " to save the data - not sure I am too convinced it was completely unsalvageable but. . . . due to the warranty it was repaired. I've spent a lot of time reloading and recovering stuff. I rely on my computer . . . for too much. I am glad I am back up and jogging.

What do you rely on that would be difficult to be without?

Big Week for Phoenix

This is a big week for Phoenix sports.  Besides hosting the Super Bowl (Patriots vs. Giants) there is a major PGA tournament going on - although there is no Tiger there will be  4 of the top 10 golfers (including #2 & #3).  

The Super Bowl alone is supposed to bring in about 400 million in revenue for the city's economy.  

Ten of the top 20 viewed TV programs all-time have been Super Bowls!

I heard on the radio that some hotels are charging up to 8 times their normal price!

Companies are paying up to 2.7 million for a thirty-second ad.  That's a lot of cash . . . 

I forgot to add that the SUNS are playing the SPURS on Thursday!

If you are hosting a party, what is the best Super Bowl snack?

It's raining, it' pouring . . .

It is a rare day in Phoenix.  Rare!  It is sunny (or partly cloudy) 325 plus days of the year.  That leaves about 40 days a year for grey days or rain. 

 

It is not messing around today.  It has rained non-stop since 5 am and as of 4:15 pm, it's not going to let up anytime soon.

What is your favorite rainy day activity?

I can't believe I did this. . . .

I knew I was going to do it!  I left off one of my favorite drummers.  One that has influenced me and many others.  He can be heard on the radio, on any given pop station.  The thing that bothers me about leaving him off is that he and Vinnie are tops to me!  

Abe Laboriel Jr. has it all.  Besides being the backbeat for Paul McCartney, he's also laid down groove for Sting, Sheryl Crow, Clapton, Shakira, Jewel, Liz Phair, Vanessa Carlton, and both Simpson girls.  Here is a complete list.

Three words that describe his drumming to me:  Passion, Power, Passionate-Power!  Entertaining to watch and has such a solid groovy groove.

Rock on Abe!  Rock on!  For your drumming greatness and my forgetfulness . . . you get your own post.

Any others I've left off?  Who is your top three favorite drummers?

Favorite . . . Drummers

Now drummin' is near and dear to my heart. Inevitably someone who "should" be on the list will be left off. These are my favorites right now.

1. Vinnie Colaiuta: He is my favorite of all time. The dude is a legend to say the least. I first heard of him in the early 90's although he was playing with Frank Zappa way back when. His handle of odd times is incredible. I saw him at Yoshi's in Oakland and was glad my Wes and my family got to enjoy the experience as well. Probably not as much as I though! My favorite recording of his . . . Sting's Ten Sumner's Tales - Clinic on drummin'.

The rest are not in any order . . . .
2. Carter Beauford: Looks like he is having a blast behind the kit. Is the train that moves DMB.

3. Chris Coleman: His work with Israel Houghton is phenomenal. He has some of the quickest hands and feet. Makes it look easy.

4. ?uestlove: (Ahmir Thompson) This guy grooves and then . . . grooves some more. Nobody better in the Hip Hop / Neosoul world.

5. J J Johnson: Not to be confused with the Wynton Marsalis Trombone player. I've seen this guy twice live and countless on TV and DVD. Writes the text book at what a pocket feels like. If you ever see him . . . his head and shoulders tell the story. Simple, powerful, solid, money! John Mayer did well in hiring this guy.'

6. Stewart Copeland: For all the fighting that went on with The Police . . . They made great music. Stewart blended lots of styles to give them their unique brand. Rock has lunch with Reggae and coffee with Jazz. Great composer as well.

These Guys have had some influence on my drumming over the years:
Honorable mentions: Chris McHugh (Garth, Lincoln, Currently with Keith Urban) | Bill Maxwell (my childhood hero)- Andre Crouch, Koinonia | Steve Brewster (Faith Hill, Awake America - Lindell Cooley, Nashville Session Guy) | Scott Williamson (Nashville Session Guy, FFH, Lincoln) | Tony Williams (Jazz Great, Miles, and others) | Jeff Pocarro (Toto) | Alex Acuna (LA Session Guy, Weather Report, Koinonia)

Challenges in Church Planting

All church plants have challenges . . . some same and some different in nature.  

One of my friends (yes, I have more than one!) lives in Iowa.  He is on staff at a church plant there and well . . . it snows in Iowa.  Not sure I would like snow to as one of our challenges at The Crossroads!

Here's a pic of setting up church, in January, in Iowa!

Favorite . . . Snacks!

I've turned over a new leaf in the last couple of years. Just trying to take care of myself a little better. My top five snack foods. Not in any order:

1. Carrot sticks (dipped in ranch - when I'm feeling crazy)
2. Raw almonds (Trader Joe's)
3. A warm pita dipped in hummus. (23 seconds in the micro and enjoy!)
4. Cranberry Ice Pops - (Ocean Spray poured in the ice cube trays. Don't forget the toothpicks)
5. Smoothies with silken tofu and frozen berries (seasonal) Tofu is a great alternative protein source without saturated fat.

OK - who am I kidding! Here is the real list.

1. Melissa's Oatmeal Chocolate Chip Cookies - Great out of the oven. Incredible frozen treat - Don't knock it til you've tried it!
2. Peanut M&M's - I used to be a plain guy for years. Still like them, but loving the salty/sweet thing these days!
3. Pepperidge Farm double chocolate cookies. I don't care for the milk choco. Gotta be the dark. So light and crumbly . . . you blink and 4/5 are gone!
4. Fuji apples - Nothing like them in season. This seems like it should go on the healthy list but I really like them! The only stipulation with apples . . . I eat more of them when they are cut up wedges.
5. Grapes - Got to be careful not to eat too many at one setting. Love the purple ones!

Honorable mentions: Bowl of Cereal, pistachios, cashews, brownies (homemade), Snickers - really satisfies!, fresh pineapple

What are your top three?

Favorite . . . . Guitarist

I like lists.  Letterman's Top 10, Best Team Ever, Best Burgers in Town . . . you get the picture.  

Today I read an article about one of my most favorite guitarist. This is the first time a Christian artist has been featured in Premier Mag. It reminded me of how cool he is besides being a great guitaritst.  His personal instruction and direction changed paradigms in music for me.  It shows the impact someone can have, if only for a short period of time.

Not in any order:

1.  John Mayer - his cool factor is off the charts, can make SRV's licks sound like his own, and can write a good song!

2.  Lincoln Brewster - Getting to hang around him, for the selected moments in Modesto, made me want to be a better musician.  Just makes playing the guitar look fun.

3.  Wes O'Haire - Not as known, yet, as the others on this list but should be.  Groove, style and soul.  Well-rounded - can play Rock, Jazz, and Classical in the same set!  Heppest of cats and great friend.

4.  Joey Bombaci - The dude knows his stuff and his licks.  Can look at a guitar and tell you the make, model and serial number!  Enjoy his company.  Joey can be heard on any given weekend in the Alt. Service at CCV.

5.  Stevie Ray Vaughn - Need I say more.  All the four mentioned above own him gratitude.  Heart and Soul blues - "Little Wing" and "Pride and Joy" are my favorites.

Had the privilege of playing with three of my five favorite.  The honor was mine!

**Note:  Joey's picture was not available at time of push-button publishing.  He has a great dome!

Do you have a favorite, not on this list? Let me know.

Disappointment

I am disappointed.  I failed to fulfill the expectations of . . . myself.  I believe in the statement I saw on a Gatorade shirt that said, "The best inspiration is not to outdo others but to outdo yourself."I didn't outdo myself.  I set out to run in the PF Chang Rock N' Roll Marathon (Jan. 13) - read here.  I don't do the little things I did on my first.  

One was signing up and paying for it.  I didn't do that.  

The other was sticking to my plan.  I didn't do that!  

Third was getting sick.  I did that!  After being sick for about a week/half.  I never recovered

the motivation to run the marathon.  

As I watched the coverage this weekend I am disappointed.  My new goal is San Diego - June 1. I plan to go by the book.   It worked last time.  Why not again!  I feel/hear my athletic clock ticking. 

Any tips on how one may outdo their self?  Any external motivation tips?

Being Three is cool!

Our church turned three this weekend. We had CCV pastor Don Wilson speak. Being a church plant, CCV helped our start and we feel great being an extension of what God is doing through that body.

The Crossroads also commissioned it's first group of elders. Here is a quote I ran across a couple days ago that helps describe our group. "An imperfect system filled with men and women of integrity will function far better than a perfect system filled with men and women who lack integrity." That is what we have at The Crossroads.

I am glad to be a part of what God is doing in the Northwest Valley of Phoenix. Here are some pics of the weekend.

On simplifying life . . .

This quote really speaks to me in our world of never ending messages, advertisements, and information.

 "The ability to simplify means to eliminate the unnecessary so that the necessary may speak."-Hans Hofmann

It poses a question to me.  What in my life is unnecessary that can be eliminated?  

Happy New Year - Chug Contest

Last night my boys and I stayed up and watched the ball drop. We talked about our most special moment of 2007 and gave thanks, played the Wii, watch some Mythbusters and had our first annual Chug Contest.

The contest will be an annual New Year's Eve event. The Champion will hold the crown for the entire year. Now the audio is not so great we were trying to be quiet (Melissa and Gigi) were in bed asleep. (if you have an RSS feed you'll have to go to the blog home).

Congratulations to the winner!

2007 - Top Ten

It's December 31 and want to review some of the top ten things that happened throughout this year. (Not in any order)

1. A visit from our friend/family - The Kitchen's. We enjoy our time with them and they enrich our lives deeply.

2. I kept my only resolution this year. To blog more than I did last year (35 entries total 2007). I cranked it up in December finishing strong with double digits. I plan to blog at least once a week this next year!

3. Joining the vision of The Crossroads. This time last year I was jobless and seeking God's direction. I learned much in the transition from CCV to The Crossroads one of which God's timing and direction really it best. We may think we have together. Ever so true: "We can make our plans, but the Lord determines our steps." - Prov. 16:9

God provided for us in such unexpected ways. Our house, a newer car given to us, various household furniture items, peaceful sleep were just a few of the many blessings.

4. I read many books. Two favorites were "It came from within" - A. Stanley and "Made to Stick" - C. Heath and D. Heath

5. Going to New Orleans on a short-term missions trip. Really put the need there in perspective.

6. 13 years being married to Melissa. She's the best thing that has happened to me. My love for her grows each year . . . I am grateful.

7. I don't like to admit it but . . . I am a MacSnob (as my wife calls me). I love my MacBook!

8. Our visit with the Cinfios. Gianna and Mikayla are cute together.

9. Going to the John Mayer concert at Glendale Arena with my bro! Good times, Good Music!

10. Playing in the worship band at with Joey, Andy, David, Gary, Steve, Mary J. and the rest. It stretched me once again . . . Good times to remember fondly. My favorite worship LP . . . (The only one I bought) my buddy Ricardo and His team rock!\

11. I recognized growth (physically, mentally, spiritually) in my boys this year. They are becoming great young men of God. Their personalities have really developed. Dangerous Boys Club, Rock Climbing, Swimming, Football in the rain, Our trip to Guitar Center, and the Rocket Launch this past Christmas were major highlights!

OK - that's it. I actually had 11. 2007 was a redefining year for me. I trust God deeper, appreciating my family members more and want others to know they matter to God!

30 Days

I spoke on 30 Days to Live: Living life in High Def. I really enjoyed it. I have yet to hear the responses from our iCare space. It was great having my parents with us in service. It was a great service to end the year.

I ended the message with Making Peace with your Relationships. I showed this video and had a great response to it.

Me and My Drum

Being a drummer this has always been a favorite Christmas tune. Trent Austin and his team at LifeChurch.tv rocked it! Great sample from "The Who" in the middle.

We all want to belong | Fit in!

This came from the Director of Community at a church in the Midwest. It was a wake up call to be aware of the obvious - and aware that people matter and want to belong. It's up to us to help facilitate that.

"At 8:15 this past Sunday morning, I see this guy wandering in the area near staff mailboxes and the bathrooms. He doesn't seem like he's waiting for anyone. He doesn't stop anyone to ask for direction. (I was one of at least 3 people who walked by him.) He is definitely looking around. Yeah, he is out of place. I don't stop him. I don't inquire. I just noticed. (Not my proudest Director of Community moment!)

Less than 5 minutes later, I now see him in the atrium wandering but definitely uncomfortable. The only other people are a few staff and volunteer leaders setting up for the day, and some GCC regulars meeting early for coffee. He stood out again. He's looking around. Weird. What is he doing?

Wait. He's making a move. He starts walking toward the exit doors with determination. For whatever reason, I now decide that if he has just stalked the place, I should probably say something to let him know he was noticed.

Just as he's opening the second set of doors to reach the cold air, I reach him. "Can I help you find anything?" With a slight dialect of another language, "Well, I was supposed to serve today. It was my first time, but I can't find where I'm supposed to go. So..." Feeling like a complete schmuck, "Ohhhh. We can find the team. Let me help you." Within 2 minutes, we found the team leader, made the introduction, and poof! Connection made! I saw him later that morning serving confidently.

People are uncomfortable when they take a step. It's new. They don't know what to expect. They don't do what seems obvious to us who are already connected. Really! Yes, I know it doesn't make sense. Virtually everyone in the building at that time could have helped him. He only needed to ask. He did not feel comfortable to stop anyone.

Taking a step is a big deal. I want to be noticed - to be significant - to connect - to fit in. At the same time, I don't want to be noticed as different - as not fitting in. I am glad I had this glimpse into the experience of our people. It gives me passion to do all that we can to make it easy for them."

Bad Day!

I saw this on one of the streets in the French Quarter. Now that's a bad day!

New Orleans - Day Three

Today was a quick but hard days work. We worked on The Gathering - a new church that will serve the Chalemette area. It was completely gutted and needs a new roof. Our mission today was to tear off a portion of the roof. Portion was good cause it was difficult. It felt good finish it and know we got the renovation off to a good start.

We toured the Crossroads Missions Headquarters. It was a few blocks from Lake Ponchartrain (that overflowed so heavily). We also toured the 9th Ward again (in daylight). It was devastated. Harry Connick Jr.'s effort at Musicians Village was interesting too.

Enjoyed my time in New Orleans and hope others will get the opportunity to do the same. Next time, should I get to go, I hope to get to hear the stories of people Katrina effected.

Got home at 11:30 pm last night. I am a little sore today but glad to be home.

New Orleans - Day One and Two!

I am here for a few days helping a group of guys restoring houses destroyed by Hurricane Katrina. I really didn't know what to expect. It amazes me that there are houses that have been completely abandoned with no guarantee the owner will come back and restore it. Many have and many haven't.

I like the helpfulness of the neighbors and neighborhoods - at least in the areas we are working in. It's a Three Musketteers "All for One, One for All" kind of tude. I would say that New Orleans is back on it's feet but it has a huge limp! I think the housing situation will be a huge hurdle. Businesses are coming in and the population is growing but the unclaimed houses will be an issue of when and how they will be occupied again.

Saw the Pink Campaign helped by Jolie and Pitt. 9th Ward is . . . . wow!

Matt Woodward is planting a church called The Gathering. We are helping him renovate a claimed bowling alley tomorrow. He will do a great work here in Chalemette.

I enjoyed touring the Quarter tonight. Bourbon street was narrow and dirty. I liked the antiquity of the city, the history. Definitely would not want to live here. That's me. Looking forward to coming home tomorrow.

Dinner Conversation

This cracks me up. I love how it intensifies as is progresses. Good Times!

N'awlens

Leaving on a Jet Plane . . . . going to New Orleans on a short term missions trip. Not sure what to expect. I am hoping to get some good footage for missions promotion. Also, I am looking forward to meeting some new people and get to know some of the Crossroaders (already there serving) a little better.

I will miss my family... I have a lot to look forward to coming back home!

Know yourself

I read this recently from the Pastor's Coach Newsletter and it really resonants with me. Steve and I recently had a discussion about knowing what you are good at and knowing what you are not gifted at - and being OK with both.

"The heart of a good coach is honest about personal strengths and weaknesses.
Maturely embracing the phrase “know thyself” is core to good coaching. A good coach is self-aware but not self-absorbed. There is a huge difference between the two. When you are self-aware, you know what you are good at and what you are not good at, and you are comfortable with that. When you are self-absorbed, you obsess over what you are not good at and seek attention for what you are good at. When you are self-aware you have a solid appreciation of yourself as you are. When you are self-absorbed, you have a selfish (or even narcissistic) love of self. This is often a false love based on personal insecurities.

John Maxwell has coached me for many years. And though John is highly gifted he will quickly admit what he is not good at. For a general example, when it comes to coaching someone in something that is very intuitive to him, something that comes as natural as breathing, he doesn't coach others in that very well. For a specific example, he knows that counseling or therapy is not his gift! So, he's comfortable saying he's not able to coach you in that skill. Far too often people attempt to coach in an area they know very little about and therefore the coaching is ineffective."

He took my cookie!

I was at the park with Gigi today. This boy stood in front of us as we enjoyed our Chocolate Chunk Cookie. I asked his dad if I could give him a pinch, which he devoured. Two minutes later, he came back over, and as I was talking to his dad, the boy reached in my bag, grabbed my cookie and shoved it in his mouth. Gone!

I think he may have taken a drink of my Mocha when I wasn't looking too . . .

Little sucker!

YouVersion | Dashboard

YouVersion | Dashboard


Heard about this new tool to engage God's Word with all our other media tools. Sounds intriguing and peaks my interest. It's beta version now but early adopters will dig it's capabilities already. I expect this to be a great resource for many.

Guest Services of the future

I saw this on the internet and thought how cool to have more of these roaming malls, churches, amusement parks. Having a set place is good for map purposes but . . . I know which one is more inviting for me.

What about you?

To Twit or not to Twit

I don't get technology sometimes. Sometimes. Sure I've drank the Apple cool-aide, I carry a cell phone, and can shoot par golf on the Wii. But Twitter has Tweeked me.

At first, I thought it was a step beyond blogging into the world of "I am soooo important that you will want to know what I am doing throughout my day" - kind of a blog on roids! I was kind of resenting those who Twit.

Today I turned over a new leaf. I read this article and have a greater appreciation for the Twitter Nation. I have yet to sign up, but if I decide that I have a following that may care . . . . the two of you that may or may not read my blog will be the first to know!

What a story to tell

I saw this on Snopes. Here's the story:

Wow and I thought my childhood mumps and chicken pocks at the same time story was a good one! Not compared to this one.

Seth Godin on Creativity - "99% of the time, in my experience, the hard part about creativity isn't coming up with something no one has ever thought of before. The hard part is actually executing the thing you've thought of."

Isn't that the truth.

What inspires you?

I recently asked this question to my coworkers. I decided to jump in and let my inspirations known: (As of today....)

:: I admire my sons (Jack and Nate). They have a real love for life and more spunk than a pack of Mentos in Diet Coke

:: My wife makes me think about things that I may not other wise. She has a great perspective on things and her Godly heart shows through. I am a better man for marrying her...in too numerous ways to count

:: Gigi is such a joy. I love her inhibited passion to sing at the top of her lungs, even when nobody is listening

:: Wes O'Haire's creativity in design and music

:: My brother's resilience

:: Walking into any Apple Store. Inspiration and imagination flood my creative soul.

:: Stories like Rocky (the original). Overcoming all the odds stepping into a God-design. The character Rocky was born to box ... Note to self Sly: Keep us wanting more.

:: Groove in 5 or 7 (Meter). Listen to St. Augustine in Hell, Seven Days - Sting

:: Hebrews 12:1 - Do you see what this means—all these pioneers who blazed the way, all these veterans cheering us on? It means we'd better get on with it. Strip down, start running—and never quit! No extra spiritual fat, no parasitic sins. Keep your eyes on Jesus, who both began and finished this race we're in. Study how he did it. Because he never lost sight of where he was headed—that exhilarating finish in and with God—he could put up with anything along the way: Cross, shame, whatever. And now he's there, in the place of honor, right alongside God. When you find yourselves flagging in your faith, go over that story again, item by item, that long litany of hostility he plowed through. That will shoot adrenaline into your souls!

Well, that a few to start with. I am sure there will be others to follow.

We like me ... and others like me.

I saw this picture from a friend's blog today:

It's just another reminder of how businesses work hard to find things in common with their audiences. How can a church or should a church work harder at it, too?

It can be done in the most simple ways...got milk?

Plano vs Tyler Comeback

You have to watch it to the end. . . . "I'm about to throw up"

We're better and thoughts like it

I've thought about for the last three or four years. It really bothers me when well-meaning people ask me or others what kind of church one attends. Now don't misunderstand, I've never been asked because someone actually thought I was going Mormon or Hindu. They were mainly concerned if I was at a "seeker" church or not. I think it's silly to think that way. It's funny cause those in ministry have been around and have aligned themselves with the style of church/ministry that best suits them and their perspective on scripture. Most seem to do it and don't think twice about placing their vilified label.

I read this today - about a panel talking to thousands of ministry/church leaders on leadership and other church related matters. I found it an appropriate thought for what I've been feeling but not articulating:

"One of the panelists stated about his local church: "We're a discipling church" I'm wondering, what does that even mean? What's a church look like that's not a "discipling church?" Does this comment imply that the rest of us aren't discipling churches? I think, often, in leader's efforts to activate Christ-followers to live out their faith, to reach out to poorer people, to engage the environment as good stewards, they/we tend to attach a word like "discipleship" to the conversation and somehow suggest that the "right" model has finally been discovered.

Our labels - seeker church, teaching church, discipling church, (worshiping), (Spirit-filled/led)reaching church – risk alienating us from each other. These labels suggest that some churches are somehow better, somehow enlightened. Seems to me that in a conversation intending to point out that we've created a poor image of ourselves and our Lord (which is a great observation), we spark divisiveness among us and in doing so, we counter our own objective. (Dlake Editorial: Are the labels we put on ourselves and others for other Christians or for those who are non-churched, dislike the church, and could careless what it's called.)

How about we just be the church (or Christ-followers). What if we – together – focused on caring about those who have not experienced the truth about how God sees them, how much they matter to him. What if… "

I would love to hear someone ask me. . . Is your church about God's Kingdom? That would be refreshing!

Maturity comes with pain . . .

I grew up hearing that . . . "Maturity doesn't come with age but with the acceptance of responsibility." I really believe that. Not just in life but in my Christian existence. Here are a couple of other thoughts regarding mature Christ-followers from an article I recently read on the subject.

"The marks of maturity? Self-sustaining in spiritual devotions. Wise in human relationships. Humble and serving. Comfortable and functional in the everyday world where people of faith can be in short supply. Substantial in conversation; prudent in acquisition; respectful in conflict; faithful in commitments.

Take a few minutes and ask how many people you know who would fit such a description. How many? Apparently, Paul, pondered the question when he thought about Corinthian Christians and said, "I could not address you as spiritual but as worldly—mere infants in Christ."

Additionally, mature Christians become mature by suffering, facing challenges that can arouse fear and a sense of inadequacy. Mature Christians learn to wrestle with questions that defy simple answers. They learn to say strategic and tactical "no's" when others are indulging themselves by saying "yes."

I suppose it can be said that maturity doesn't come with age but with the acceptance of . . . a Savior. That's where true spiritual growth begins. What a great basis on which to grow.

:: Welcome to Collide Magazine ::

:: Welcome to Collide Magazine ::

Came across a cool site today. I think it will help . . . me!

You said what?

I read this today and thought, "Man, I could be better!" Is what I have to say more important. I'd have to say yes. I am going to speak less and listen more!

____________________________________________
Good Questions Show Good Listening
Learn to understand people and help them understand themselves.
by Doug Self

Editor's note: This material was originally written to help pastors improve their listening skills while visiting church members in their homes. It has been adapted for small groups.

According to Robert L. Montgomery, author of Listening Made Easy, the ten most common characteristics of a good listener are:
• Looks at me while I'm speaking.
• Questions me to clarify what I'm saying.
• Shows concern by asking questions about my feelings
• Repeats some things I say.
• Doesn't rush me.

• Is poised and emotionally controlled.
• Responds with a nod of the head, a smile, or a frown.
• Pays close attention.
• Doesn't interrupt me.
• Keeps on the subject until I've finished my thoughts.


I'm impressed that two of the top three characteristics have to do with the ability to ask questions. A good listener, it seems, is also someone who asks good questions. So over the years I've worked on asking good questions—ones that will both keep the discussion on target and help me know more about the person with whom I talk.
Subject-Changing Questions
In a small group, there simply isn't time for everyone to conduct a lengthy conversation. So sometimes, when it seems appropriate, a leader must gently nudge the conversation toward spiritual concerns. That must be done naturally and non-intrusively, of course. A good rule of thumb is to change the subject only when others begin to run out of steam on their original topic.

For example, John is excitedly telling me about a remodeling project, going into great detail. I grow restless and want to get on to spiritual matters. While he's between sentences, I may be tempted to insert, "That's great, John. But how's the remodeling of your Christian life going?" That would be jolting and inappropriately timed. If I can't gracefully move the conversation along, then I'd just as soon hear people out on subjects that are dear to them.
At the right time, however, directive questions can link spiritual matters to the person's subject of conversation. For example, if the other person is talking about childhood, I might ask, "What memories of church do you have from childhood?" and "What did you most enjoy about your childhood church experience?"

Subject-Probing Questions
I use gentle, subject-probing questions to discover background, feelings, attitudes, interests, questions, and needs. These questions help people focus on the subject under discussion. They allow people to sort through their experiences and analyze their reasons and feelings. They also help me learn key facts.
These questions are not that difficult to formulate. I simply ask, in one form or another, the classic journalistic questions: "Who?" "What?" "When?" "Where?" "Why?" and "How?" For example, if I'm talking with someone who expresses hostility about something, I might ask one or more of the following:

• "When did you begin to feel this way?"

• "What experience has most influenced you to feel this way?"

• "Why do you think you responded that way to that experience?"

• "Who has been helpful to you in this situation?"

• "Where do you think all this is heading?"

• "How have you tried to handle this so far?"


Such questions help me understand people and help people understand themselves. As a result, people often discover previously hidden inconsistencies or underlying assumptions.

Think about this:
• Which signs of a good listener do you demonstrate well? Which need improvement?
• How long should a leader allow the group to discuss trivial things before changing the subject to deeper matters?
• In which group situations would subject-probing questions work well?

The Marathon Begins . . . Again!

I started training for my second marathon today. Just got back from my first run and my legs ... jello. After running I realized I've got to get a little internal motivation. In 2002, I had the newness of the training, the journey. This time I am going into this eyes wide open.
:: I know how the miles are going to wear on me.
:: I know the aches and pains. I know how my body will tighten up a bit - in a good way.
:: I know how my energy will increase.
:: I know how good the discipline of running four times a week will do me.
:: I know what a great feeling it is to cross the line after logging hundreds of miles over sixteen weeks of training wearing out two pairs of Adidas Supernovas.
:: I know this is going to be good for me! I have to remind myself this is a marathon I'm in, not a sprint. Ain't that the truth!

Kimmel breaking it down. . . .

Many have seen the YouTube Vid of Miss Teen (South Carolina). Her answer was a bunch of nothing. Jimmy breaks it down.

Loving Life!

I am pretty happy with my weekend experience. First, we had friends from Chicago come visit. Their daughter Mikeyla was Gianna's crib mate for their first eleven months of life together. What a bond with someone! I enjoyed seeing them play with each other, appreciate each other, love each other. It is a one of those things you hear about where you can be away from someone in proximity yet close to them in your heart. I believe in that with certain people in life. Absence does make the heart grow fonder. With others it is . . . out of sight out of mind, unfortunately.

Secondly, we at The Crossroads had our first in service baptism. The message about baptism was the best I've ever heard bridging the OT sacrificing of lambs for sin removal to the NT and Jesus our ultimate sacrificial Lamb. We had five people decide that they wanted to make a public profession of their faith and on the spot change into clothes we bought for that occasion. Man I respect that! Putting aside all fears, all uncertainties, and stepping out in obedience. In all 12 took the plunge and I had the privilege to dip nine of them. God gets all the credit and I was honored to be a part of such a great experience for them, our church . . . and me!

Lastly, I really enjoy my family. I know I've blogged about them in the past and may sound redundant but I enjoy their company. Yeah, the boys have been at each other a little more lately and Gigi's screams have been a little higher but when it comes down to it . . . they are the closest part of me and visa versa. Really enjoyed my moments with Jackson this weekend especially. He and I are connecting well lately, whether it's playing the Wii together, short trips to Wal-mart, or talks about life lessons.

I adore and am so proud of Melissa. She is the love of my life!

I've got my issues . . . but despite them, I'm loving my life.